


When Times Get Rough (I’ll Hold You Close)

by lostinthesounds



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Deckerstar - Freeform, F/M, Happy Ending, lucifer wants to go back to hell, post season3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-14 00:17:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17498039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinthesounds/pseuds/lostinthesounds
Summary: Lucifer’s knuckles turn white against the glass cup he’s holding. “It’s been six months, Amenadiel. If she cared, she would’ve called.”Amenadiel softly smiles at how angry the other man was, something of pity and acceptance. “You think she’s scared of you? Didn’t you say she was an atheist of some sort?”“She is, or at least she was.” Lucifer closes his eyes, wishing things could’ve been so much different. “The realization of her work partner being the Devil might’ve changed her mind, especially when falling for me.”OR — A sudden visit from the woman he loved after six months, was the only thing that convinces Lucifer not to go back to Hell. (Post 3x24)





	When Times Get Rough (I’ll Hold You Close)

**Author's Note:**

> This monster of a fic took me two days to write. There might be some typos but overall, I’m proud of this child of mine!! 
> 
> Please enjoy, and thank you for reading <3

 " ** _I was once told that the love I felt beating inside my chest was nothing more than my mind playing an unfair trick on my heart, and like a pair of dice dancing along the uneven pavement, their fate, much like yours or mine had already been decided."_**

 

* * *

 “You can’t be serious.” 

 

Amenadiel argues, setting his drink glass down on the bar. His head tilts, to look at his determined brother. “Luci, you wanna go back to Hell? Now?” 

 

Lucifer nods rapidly, his mind filling with thoughts that revolve around keeping his past at bay. If he leaves, no one would care to miss him. (It was proven when the detective— _Chloe_ , wouldn’t call him back after his devil face showing.) 

 

“What’s the problem?” He shrugs, locking eyes with the angel. “I thought you were dying to send me back to Hell for the past six years? Well, I’m ready now.” 

 

Amenadiel shakes his head, they both know that wasn’t the point he wanted to get across. All he wanted to do was bring his brother back to the place he called home, to not upset their celestial father who controls everything. He may not see it, but Amenadiel _knows_ his brother very well. Lucifer doesn’t want to leave, not without saying goodbye to Chloe, to his partner. 

 

“What about Chloe? Wouldn’t you miss her?” 

 

There’s a look of longing in the eyes of the Devil, how much pain she’s put him through these last six months. He fell so hard, so quick, for a woman he’s _supposed_ to be with. “That doesn’t matter now.” 

 

“You miss her terribly, don’t you brother?” 

 

Lucifer’s knuckles turn white against the glass cup he’s holding. “It’s been six months, Amenadiel. If she cared, she would’ve called.” 

 

Amenadiel softly smiles at how angry the other man was, something of pity and acceptance. “You think she’s scared of you? Didn’t you say she was an atheist of some sort?” 

 

“She is, or at least she _was_.” Lucifer closes his eyes, wishing things could’ve been so much different. “The realization of her _work partner_  being the Devil might’ve changed her mind, especially when falling for me.” 

 

Amenadiel says in awe, finally getting what this was about and starts to walk closer to the other man. “She doesn’t believe in this stuff.” He doesn’t hold back when he sees Lucifer turn away from him, he’s _avoiding_. “Chloe wouldn’t have a problem with this, with believing in celestial beings. It’s _you_ who has a problem with showing her—“ 

 

Lucifer freezes, and his body felt cold. 

 

“Do you really think I have a problem with showing her who I truly am!” He turns slowly with a serious tone to his darker voice and continues, “She believed in who I was, who _we_ were together.” 

 

Amenadiel walks around the counter to face his brother, almost chest to chest and his eyes are locked. “She isn’t scared of the Devil, she’s scared of what you two have, Lucifer.” 

 

“How can you be so sure?” Lucifer grits his teeth, “Please enlighten me, brother.” 

 

“Anyone with a decent pair of eyes can see how much you cared about eachother, that doesn’t change anything now. You still care for a human.” 

 

“That’s exactly what she is, mortal.” 

 

“You always find another one, Luci.” 

 

“I don’t want—“ Lucifer snaps, stepping back to distance himself. “I don’t want to love someone I can’t keep forever.” 

 

Amenadiel fires back instantly, “Father made her for you, he wants you to be devoted to her. He knew how angry you would be with him, so he gave you happiness. This is _your_ shot, Luc—“ 

 

He gets cut off, “If he knows so much then why couldnt he make Chloe another demon or someone I don’t care about? Why her?” Lucifer feels his blood start to boil, a wave of red flashes in his brown eyes. “ _Why_!” 

 

“It’s a challenge. He wants to make his faults up, he wants to fix things with you.” Amenadiel says with sorrow, following his brother’s pace as he walks towards his grand piano. 

 

“You should know, that I don’t care about father’s wishes.” Lucifer sighs, his hands are shaking against the white and black keys but he still presses down. “If Chloe doesn’t want me, the _Devil_ —“ He pauses to shut his glowing eyes to let the reality of his immortality sink in, to remind himself of the pain he caused. “Then why do I need to stay here? I want to go home, and I’m perfectly fine if you aren’t willing to accompany me.” 

 

 

Amenadiel rubs his face with both of his hands, hating how stubborn Lucifer can be. As much as he wants to return home back to Heaven, he can’t just leave what he’s come to know. He can’t leave Linda or the detective, his human friends were worth the time. Even if he could slow or stop it, he doesn’t want to waste it. 

 

 

“I can’t go with you.” 

 

 

A deep chuckle erupts in Lucifer’s chest and it’s more daunting than it was amusing. This wasn’t something to laugh about, Hell was dark and scary and endless tormenting for the guilty and remorseful. 

 

“Why not? You wouldn’t have to stay any longer than I need. Amenadiel, you could go back to father.” Lucifer argues, letting his fingers hover over the piano keys with careless actions. “That’s what you wanted right? To return to Heaven?” 

 

“Lucifer, I don’t want that.” 

 

Lucifer stands up with so much force that his seat flew behind him, and he leans forward to hold himself up. “Then what the _bloody_ hell do you want from me?” 

 

He doesn’t stop, “I’m exhausted with what everyone expects me to be! Just tell me what you desire, Amenadiel.”

 

His brother turns around with blank expression, a slow nod that makes his neck ache, and he walks towards the elevator. “This isn’t about me, Lucifer.” 

 

“It might as well be!” Lucifer shouts at his brother, who’s walking into the elevator. “I haven’t talked to anyone who seemed to care about me since I revealed my Devil face to the detective...so talk to me!” 

 

Amenadiel locks eyes with his troublesome brother, taking notice of the pain in way he carried himself like he was truly a burden. His finger hesitated to press the button to go back down to Lux but he didn’t want to press it just yet. 

 

“You’re going back?” He wasn’t going to yell, but speak normally. “For real?” 

 

“There’s no other place I can call home anymore.” Lucifer says, then his voice gets drowned out by the music he starts to play. Even through his suffering, he still manages to fake a big smile and usher his brother along on his way. “You should get going.” 

 

“Are you going to say goodbye?” 

 

“Aren’t I doing that right now, brother?” 

 

Amenadiel’s thumb presses the elevator button with all of his might. “Not goodbye to me, you idiot. I meant to Chloe because you should see her.” 

 

Neither of them say anything, and the silence that followed was deafening. It was all Lucifer could hear, the rapid heart beat in his chest that fills his ear drums and the feeling of regret is heavy on his heart. He _should_ see Chloe. 

 

He knows how much he wants to, how much he wants to see her face. Lucifer can’t help but wonder what she’s doing and if she was alright. 

 

Six months is a long time. 

 

When he returns to Hell, Lucifer is sure that he won’t miss the aching in his chest that only grew as the days went by without Chloe. 

 

Not even one bit. 

 

* * *

 

 

He didn’t expect to get so attached to Lux, or to his penthouse. It was supposed to be a temporary void, a place to find pleasure and enjoy his time on Earth. 

 

Now with his final glance around his apartment, Lucifer realizes how good he had it. He was _happy_ here. Every other night, he would have guests over or fill the silence with songs and melodies. There was always something going on in his life, and it was fun. 

 

However, if he learned anything from how quickly his father turned against him...he should’ve expected the feeling to vanish at some point. The feeling of being admired, just gone. 

 

Then he met Chloe, a detective working with the Los Angeles Police Department on a warm night in April. The warmth in his chest upon seeing her lean on his piano was something he was used to especially with how beautiful she was, but it was different. She just felt different to him, and it wasn’t her stern voice or the authority she had over her words. 

 

Lucifer knew from the second he spoke to her, he had _seen_ her before. 

 

It still felt so unsettling. 

 

With a look into her blue eyes, he already felt himself struggling to stay afloat. The games, the teasing, the protectiveness, it was all so new. 

 

Then, she shot him in the leg with a pistol and he started to bleed. (He begged her to shoot him, to prove his immortality and how he can’t die.) So it was really his fault, but _still_. He was bleeding like a human, feeling his leg turn numb as he was left a limping man for days. 

 

If being mortal around the woman wasn't enough excitement for his father, he started to feel _things_ for her. After scrapping any ideas in his mind to distract himself from Detective Decker, to try and stop feeling the need, _want_ to keep her safe...it failed. 

 

He couldn't stop himself from stepping into a bullet, getting stabbed with a pocket knife, or getting shot multiple times to save her daughter’s life. Lucifer even back to Hell for the last time he did that, and he couldn’t believe he was going back to stay there. 

 

Here he was, the infamous Devil himself. 

 

Standing in front of his large bed that was stripped of silk sheets, overlooking his entire penthouse floor. His furniture was covered with white sheets that he found packed in the closet, his piano shut and left with stories untold. 

 

The day was nearing it’s end, the night sky was illuminating the darkness in his apartment since the lights weren’t turned on. If Lucifer was going to go back to where he belonged, he needed to do one last thing. 

 

He strides towards his balcony window and slides it open, straightening his black suit with swift hands.

 

“One last time for fun, how does that sound Dad?”

 

He’s always met with a silenced voice. 

 

Nothing has changed, it looked like. He closes the door behind him, Lucifer tilts his head up to the sky with narrowed eyes. “You wasted your time with Amenadiel. He doesn’t even want to do what you asked of him so long ago.” 

 

He takes a deep sigh, clutching his hands around the railing in front of him and continues. He was glad that his father couldn’t respond, the calm that came after disappointment was something he came to cherish. 

 

“You’re getting your wish, father. The only son you vanished to Hell, _finally_ going back.  I won’t bother any more humans on Earth, and nobody will know of divinity. It seems like a perfect plan, to exclude your creations from knowing our power? How nice of you?” 

 

If his father really responded, Lucifer could imagine it being along the lines of gratitude and concurrence. _Our power is too strong for humans to handle, you know that_. 

 

He speaks into the void of absolutely nothing of his importance, “You don’t know me, Dad. You never will.” 

 

Lucifer lets his mind run free, thinking of possible arguments from his fathers side of things. It was quite liberating, to use words to fight someone who’s caused him so much agony. _I made you, Lucifer_. 

 

“You made Chloe too, and—“ His voice cracks suddenly, a sour expression on his face. “You made her for me, and I can’t even let her choose me because of _you_!” 

 

He doesn’t even realize he’s yelling until he hears the echo that results. His eyes are burning, his throat is on fire and he feels like he’s letting himself get consumed by Hell again. 

 

“Anyways,” He composes himself, using his hands to flatten whatever creases he may of made in his suit by losing his temper. “My favor still stands.” 

 

A chill breeze passes by, and Lucifer convinces himself that any sibling or parent was listening to him. They had to be listening, someone has to know the precautions in his deal with _God_. 

 

“I’ll stay in Hell, as long as you protect Chloe Decker and her family.” He licks his dry lips, letting himself focus on a few stars in the sky. “I want them to stay alive for a long time, so _please_ allow me to have that as a final goodbye for this place.” Lucifer says softly, making sure he sounded like he made a final decision. 

 

He was spending so much time convincing other people that he wanted to leave, he couldn’t even convince himself. 

 

“That’s all I wanted from you.” 

 

Those words leave his mouth, trembling and weak. Truly, all _he_ desired now was that Chloe’s safety and happiness. 

 

It’s all he could promise, since he isn’t in her life anymore. 

 

* * *

 

  _Chloe  _

 

“Amenadiel?”

 

She rubs her eyes from sleep, which she was so rudely awaken. She hadn’t seen the man since— well, since she saw Lucifer last.

 

“What are you doing here?” She curiously asks, she squints to try to keep herself from blinding by the lamp above her head that decided to turn on. “Is everything alright?”

 

“I need your help.”

 

“It’s the middle of the night, what can you possibly need from me?” Chloe argues, using her other hand that isn’t holding the front door open to gesture to the lack of light outside. 

 

Amenadiel swallows harshly, a sadness to his usual bright features. “It’s Lucifer.” 

 

That name alone, almost makes her knees buckle. _Almost_. Her heart leaps at the mention of his name, and Chloe can’t stop her head from shaking back and forth in response. “What’s wrong?” 

 

“He’s leaving, Chloe.” 

 

Just like that, her heart shatters more than it already was. If it was anything like his trips to Las Vegas, she would be counting down the days until he returned and got any safe word of his arrival. She had no idea if he had gone anywhere during the past six months; that thought alon was enough to make her question why she let so much time pass between them. 

 

“Why does it concern me?” 

 

Chloe asks quickly, turning her head to make sure that Trixie was still in bed and luckily she was. “You’re really not giving me any reason to keep listening, Why did you come here?” 

 

She’s lying. She could _feel_ it. Her feet are itching to slip on some shoes and follow Amenadiel to wherever Lucifer happened to be, but her heart objects. How can she be so willing to fall back into the life of someone who hasn’t showed any interest in doing the same for her? It could be pity, but she wanted Lucifer to reach out first. She wanted to answer his phone calls, and not be afraid. To show him that she _wasn’t_ afraid of him, but he didn’t even dial. 

 

She could be angry all she wanted, but something was wrong with Lucifer and she wanted to know why. It’ll help her sleep tonight, she missed him. Chloe missed hearing his voice, his teasing and everything else he offered. 

 

“As you know, he’s the real Devil.” 

 

She swallows the lump in her throat that threatened to grow, it starts to burn as she nods her head. “Yeah?” 

 

“What do you know about him? Like in the books?” Amenadiel crosses his arms as anxiety fills him. 

 

“He punished people, Uh—“ Chloe pauses and continues rambling with a hand running through her hair, “He lives in Hell for all eternity.” 

 

Amenadiel leans forward as he waits for Chloe to get it, to realize what she said. 

 

 _Hell_. 

 

Her eyes widen, and even her blue eyes glow in the darkness. “Lucifer is going back to Hell, and I-I won’t see him again.” 

 

 _At least you’ll be going to Heaven, you’ll see Charlotte. I know you will_. 

 

“Amenadiel he can’t go. I need—“ She stutters, “I need to see him, please tell me he hasn’t left yet?” 

 

“We have time.” Amenadiel smiles, and gives Mazikeen a short text to come watch over Trixie as she sleeps. “If anything, I’ll slow that down too.” 

 

Chloe leaves the door open as she runs inside to slip on some old sneakers, and walks out of the house with her plaid pajamas and hair in a ponytail. 

 

She looks like a mess. 

 

If Amenadiel could read her mind, he says what she’s thinking. He closes the door for her, leaving it unlocked for Maze. “Lucifer is going to be happy to see you” He smiles again at how nervous she seemed to be, “No matter what you look like.” 

 

She believed him. 

 

How could she not? It was all that she could think about as Amenadiel sat down in her passenger seat of her police car. 

 

“Can’t you fly?” She asks, closing the driver’s side door. “Seriously.” 

 

“Yeah I can, why?” 

 

“Wouldn’t flying to Lux,” She stops to put her car in drive, “—Oh, _I don’t know_ , be faster for us right now?” 

 

Amenadiel scoffs, giving her a side glance as she starts to drive. The feeling of being in a car is nothing compared to flying, feeling the wind run through angelic feathers, it was boring. If he was being honest. “I can’t risk people seeing me with wings, and my brother isn’t dumb enough to leave two hours after I was just with him. That’s too quick of an exit.” 

 

“You spoke with him?” Chloe asks, her voice was soft. She missed him so much and she was dying to know how he was doing, how he came to this conclusion that he could leave her like this. _So selfless of him_. “How is he?” 

 

“He’s going back to Hell, Decker what makes you think he’s okay?” 

 

“I was just asking!” 

 

Amenadiel lets the silence overpower power the awkwardness, he waits it out before speaking again. “He missed you a lot, but he doesn’t do well with emotions so he hesitated everytime he wanted to call you.” 

 

Chloe let’s her mind wander, her eyes focused on the road. She knows there’s only a few more blocks until she turns into the avenue where Lux was, but maybe if she pressed her foot harder on the gas, she’ll get there fast enough. She wants to see him, wants to hold him in her arms, _wants_ all of it. She feels terrible, knowing she could’ve reached out too. Lucifer would’ve picked up on the first call, or let it ring until her conscience called her crazy and made her hang up. He was always so two-sided when it came to his emotions. 

 

She doesn’t like complicated. 

 

She just knows how she feels when she’s around Lucifer, and— 

 

 _That’s complicated_. 

 

“I wanted to call him, so bad.” 

 

“Chloe, I know. I could practically feel your guilt.” 

 

She freezes, “Can you actually—“ 

 

Amenadiel shakes his head and lets himself laugh, “No, I can’t.” 

 

Chloe sees the familar row of nightclubs that line up Lucifer’s block, she could feel the sense of familiarity run through her like dejavu. She knows this place, the noise, the women, the music. 

 

Her fingers grip tightly at her steering wheel, afraid of them being seen by Amenadiel because she could feel herself shaking. It’s been six months, and she it feels like it was yesterday where she accepted the truth. 

 

When she broke up with Pierce, the wave of conflicting emotions came back to haunt her about Lucifer. Did she love him? Can he ever settle down and love her back? How much did he care about her? Did she make a _mistake_ when she broke up with Pierce _?_

 

She found out about the Sinnerman. 

 

(She almost married the guy. How could she not see it before?) 

 

When Chloe found herself listening to Lucifer on his terrace, his words were exactly what she wanted to hear. She wanted to see him break down his walls and acknowledge his feelings about her. 

 

She wanted him, just as bad as he wanted her. _You did choose me_. 

 

The last thing she’d ever call Lucifer is a monster, someone who inflicted pain on others for enjoyment and underserving of love. She never saw him as that, she just saw him as a guy who wanted justice for the innocent that were killed. Even _after_ she realized he was the actual Devil, and how long she avoided the truth because that’s always terrifying, that didn’t change anything. 

 

He was still Lucifer, her partner in crime and her best friend. It wasn’t a mistake when she broke it off with Pierce, the only mistake she’s made is not being there for Lucifer when he thought he was alone. It was a mistake when she didn’t realize how much he cared, or how much she cares, or how that happened to turn into love. 

 

She turns onto Lucifer’s street, and parks the car in front of the club. She gives one last nervous smile to Amenadiel, who offers his hand to set the keys inside and she starts running. 

 

Chloe passed the busy club-goers who are mostly on top of eachother, passed the security guards who knew her the name already, and raced for an elevator to Lucifer’s penthouse. She hopes that she isn’t late, she doesn’t want this to be like when Lucifer first left to Vegas. 

 

She had felt so betrayed, heartbroken and lost. He was the one to put her back together, she kissed him the night before he vanished for two weeks, and he still _left_. 

 

The doors shut, and her eyes watch as the arrow moves up to each floor. Waiting for the ding, was painfully slow. She was so close she is to seeing him. To seeing his smile, his stubble, his slicked-back hair and effortless beauty that was his body in a suit. 

 

The elevator makes a sound, it dings and Chloe stays still. They open slowly, like some grand reveal in a fancy dining hall and she can’t move. Her feet are glued as she sees the furniture covered with the same _stupid_ white sheets, and no sign of Lucifer anywhere. 

 

It doesn't hurt to call out his name. 

 

“Lucifer?” 

 

 _Nothing_. 

 

“Oh no...” She starts to say, although it’s quick to turn into pleading. “ _Lucifer_!” 

 

Chloe grips at the torn edges of her sleeves, as she walks around his penthouse. She checks his kitchen, his couch, and his piano is wrapped so she doesn’t even bother.

 

The lump of tears form in her throat again, and she doesn’t stop them. He was gone, and she was alone again. She would never see him, and he left her feeling sorry and guilty. She wipes at her face, letting herself break down. 

 

Through her motion of wiping her tear streaks, she calls out his name one last time. “ _Please_ , Lucifer? It’s Chloe, I wanted to see you.” 

 

The penthouse was so quiet, she couldn’t hear anything but her heart beating. She feels like she’s gone under quicksand, she can’t feel anything but words caught in her throat and a deep sorrow in her chest with words she’ll never get to say to him. 

 

With soft footsteps towards the elevator that make the room feel so much bigger than it already was, her hand grazes over the sheet on top of the piano. Lucifer would never get to play notes on those keys, and even if he came back, he probably wouldn’t even tell her. 

 

“Detective?” 

 

She turns around so fast that she slips on her feet and her hands pull at the sheet she was holding. She steadied herself, only to have the cover hit the floor. “Hmmm?” 

 

It’s the only response she could come up with, not having looked the person in the eyes yet. It could be the person who owns the building, or Maze, or any other divine being that wants to have a special entrance in her life, she had no clue. 

 

“Tripping over your own two feet, are we?” 

 

 _The accent_. She knows who it belongs to, and her gaze slowly follow the voice until she finds it. It’s Lucifer, with his hands clasped together and he’s rocking back and forth on his heels. 

 

“I-I thought you left...” 

 

She wipes at her face more, not caring if her face turns red from pretending to be okay. She was just crying for the man right in front of her, and if that wasn’t pathetic she didn’t know what was. 

 

Lucifer shakes his head, trying to avert how strongly his fingers were interlocked with eachother. He tries to look at anything but Chloe, and it’s driving her insane. How could Amenadiel say how much he missed her, and not even say hello? 

 

“You knew I was leaving, didn’t you?” 

 

He asks, stepping backwards and away from her. “Amenadiel asked you to come here, I’m sorry for whatever trouble—“ 

 

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” She argues, surrending her hands in the air slowly as if she wanted him to know that he was alright. He wasn’t going anywhere, not on her watch. “The second I found out, I actually wanted to come.” 

 

“You wanted to say goodbye?” 

 

“ _No_ ,” Chloe replies, wanting Lucifer to _just_ look at her. “I’m not saying bye, I don’t want you to go back to Hell.” 

 

She made it sound so simple, that it even made Lucifer snap in her direction. 

 

“Why not?” 

 

His self-composure was slowly deteriorating, as he wanted nothing more than to believe her. Lucifer wanted to take her in his arms and never let go of her, but he couldn’t. He already said goodbye, and that _counts_. 

 

“I want you to stay here, so that I could see you.” Chloe declares, her back straight and her head held high. It was the truth. 

 

“You know something, detective?” He teases, his tone playful. “If you regret doing something in the future, there’s a chance you could end up where I’m going too.”

 

Her breath hitches in her throat, watching his every move as he starts to walk towards her. Chloe absentmindedly lifts her hand to reach out to him, but Lucifer doesn’t care to notice and he wasn’t even walking to her. He was in front of his piano, on the opposite side and he leans down to pick the piano cover from the floor. 

 

“I don’t regret anything I’ve done with you.” _The kisses, the hugs, the feelings_. 

 

None of it. 

 

“Are you sure, detective? If I’m being completely serious, these six months haven’t proved that for me.” He spits out with no intention to make it sound gentle. 

 

Chloe bites her lip to keep it from trembling, that wasn’t true. She wanted to do so much, she was so scared of the extent of feeling for him. It wasn’t even about his true form, it was about him. 

 

The human side of Lucifer, the real one. 

 

“Lucifer, you have to understand—“ 

 

She gets cut off with the louder voice of Lucifer, he’s finally looking at her with his chest caving for air. “What exactly do I need to understand, detective? You clearly found no use for me anymore and simply put, you don’t want the _real_ me do you?” 

 

Chloe shakes her head vigorously, “You know that’s not true.” 

 

“Then, what is the truth?” 

 

It’s quiet again, and Chloe feels her heart struck with guilt. She takes a long look at Lucifer, how his face seemed to drop in expression and his head was tilt to the side with his brows furrowed. He’s fighting himself, he _always_ does that. He just has to know that she’s in too deep with how she feels, he’s also scared. 

 

It’s not just her anymore. 

 

“I’m sorry for not reaching out. I know I should’ve, I never meant to cause you any pain Lucifer. I was waiting by the phone for so long for that call, that I _didn’t_ even use it.” Chloe takes a breath and debates if she should continue as Lucifer’s hands reach into his hair and then rub his face. “I was scared, okay?” 

 

“Were you scared of me?” He clarifies after a harsh swallowing his words, “Of the other version of myself?” 

 

“No, I wasn’t.” She says strongly, not one crack of her voice. It was honesty, and he deserved to feel it. 

 

“ _Chloe_ ,” Lucifer looks down to the floor with a small voice. “You don’t have to lie to me.” 

 

“You never lie to me, so why should I have any reason to?”

 

Although, her head was beginning to feel lightheaded. It’s been so long since he’s called her by her name, and she knows that it’s because he’s opening up to her.

 

He’s becoming more vulnerable the longer she’s standing in front of him and she wanted more. “Talk to me, Lucifer.” 

 

“Are you trying to prevent me from going back home? Is this what your return was all about?” Lucifer says, his face scrunched in pain. “I should’ve known that my brother would use you, he just wants me to stay here so that father could forgive him.” 

 

Chloe had enough, she was so tired and exhausted with effort. He just couldn’t seem to get it, “You don’t get it, Lucifer I’m here for _you_!” She makes her way around the piano, not afraid in the slightest to grab Lucifer’s hand and pull him in her direction. _Well, that’s one way to get his attention_. “As soon as Amenadiel showed up at my house, in the middle of the night, if I may add—“ She pauses, and gets lost in how wide his eyes get. Lucifer would be insane to move anything, but his hand wriggles in her grasp and suddenly, he’s interlocking their fingers. It was aggressive, but he _desired_ contact. “Lucifer, you have no idea how much I wanted to see you. How much I missed you.” 

 

He bitterly smiles, “Six months is a long time, I felt the same way.”

 

Chloe looks down at their hands together and she stares in awe. His obviously much larger hand was cradling hers, and he was holding onto her like she’d disappear if he blinked. (She would never.) 

 

“Did you want to—“ 

 

“The answer is yes,” Lucifer answers the question for her, knowing exactly what she’d say. Maybe it was the anxious feeling in chest turning to dust, or his lack of working sense in his body but he just _knew. Did you want to call me back too?_ “Everyday.” 

 

“We have a lot of time to make up for how dumb we were, so please,” She turns her attention back to his face, and lets her eyes wander in his. “Don’t go.” 

 

She knows she’s an inch away from hearing herself beg for him to stay behind, but she’s a woman who’s willing to do anything to make him do so. The idea hits her, and she leans in much closer. Chloe cups his face in her hands and listens for a low gasp that escapes his throat, and he’s utterly gone at this point. Hell, is _what_ again? 

 

With a soft graze of her thumbs under his eyes, she feels his body lose tension and stay still. “Do I have any chance at making you stay? Did you even pack anything?” 

 

Lucifer’s eyes flutter closed, “The devil doesn’t do any packing of any kind. He kind of, just chooses to leave whenever he wants.” 

 

“So basically, you didn’t do anything.”

 

“I was gonna leave this all behind, in the past.” He begins to say, gesturing his hands to penthouse covered in sheets and false promises to abandon it. “Then I got a visit.” He teases, squeezing her hand in response. 

 

Chloe questions, “You were gonna leave me? Forever?” 

 

“Let’s just say,” He soothes, a hand coming up to rest on her hip. “This was stretching my time window of waiting for you.”

 

His grip on her hip was strong, but he didn’t even pull her close. She would gladly fix that, as she shrugs herself closer to his chest. Her skin felt like it was on fire, completely warm to the touch and being around Lucifer wasn’t helping her focus to convince him to stay with her.  His eyes are wide again, at a loss for words. 

 

“I think you should be happy that Amenadiel came to get me.” She breathes into her words with such gentleness that it makes him smile. 

 

“Oh really? How so.” His hand slides around and uses that as leverage to slide any closer to her body. They were dancing on ice, prepared to fall at any moment but living for right _now_. If they fell, they would be together. If they got hurt, they would be healing _together_. 

 

 

“He knew he could use me as a pawn to get you to stay here.” Chloe says, licking her lips as his head seems to dip lower with each word. “And I’m really happy he did. I never thought that the Devil, you could make me _so_ happy.” 

 

“So you admit my brother used you?” 

 

He entertains the idea, loving how she lets out a frustrated sigh and can’t look at him because of it. Their eyes lock again, and her hands drop from his face with how intense everything was. His breath was tickling her nose, the warmth from the crease of his lips parted was enough to make her mouth go dry. He was going to kiss her, after all this time. 

 

Her hands are awkward at her side, but Chloe soon feels his hand on her cheek and her legs go numb. There’s a cold sensation that follows his fingers as he taps against her skin, probably a ring of some sort on one of his fingers. He’s tapping a rhythm into her features, one he’s played a multitude of times, but it’s his favorite. It ends too soon, but she doesn’t object. After all, he continues with his show of affection. It’s something they’ve both missed terribly about eachother. 

 

Lucifer feels his hand curl into the back of her jacket, bunching the material into his grasp realizing that he wasn’t thinking. He physically can’t think when he’s with Chloe, and he _craves_ to feel that over and over. It’s overwhelming at first, to feel her soft skin against his fingertips and how she constantly answers him with leaning into his hold. 

 

It’s been a while. 

 

_Too long without his detective._

 

His pointer fingertraces over her jawline only to use his fingers to dip her head up to get a better look. “You’re right, I wasn’t going to leave without saying goodbye.” Lucifer admits, his tone was strained with an emotion he can’t describe. 

 

Chloe holds in a much needed breath and allows herself to finally submerge, “So is this a goodbye?” 

 

“Not even in the slightest, I could never do that to you.” His fingers tangle in her blonde hair, only to find it still in that _damned_ ponytail. She gives him permission to let her hair down, and he jumped at the opportunity. He wraps the hair tie around his wrist, and watches as her hair cascades down her shoulders. 

 

“Lucifer, does this mean you aren’t leaving?” Chloe places a hand on his chest, his heart is beating a mile a minute and he’s just trying to stay calm. 

 

How was he going to do this? How was he just going to leave her behind? It was so irrational, so heart wrenching. _So dumb on his part_. 

 

He sighs softly, curling his right hand around her neck as he tries his best to not tangle her hair and Lucifer grins at her. “I would’ve left a long time ago if I really wanted to leave, I realize that now.” 

 

Her eyes feel heavy with tears, so she shuts them tightly to try and fight them. If he wanted to forget about her, he would’ve left before they became partners, before they kissed for the first time. Lucifer would’ve found an escape and took it, but he didn’t. 

 

“I swear to—“ She says, her voice shaky. 

 

“If you mention my father I will let go of you, I already had a stern talk with him and I don’t need reprimanding—“ He slightly jokes, feeling more than content when she laughs against his chest. 

 

“I was just going to ask if you would just kiss me already. I want you to kiss me, Lucifer.” She says shyly, wrapping both arms around his neck and twirling a few short pieces of his hair between her own fingers. “Do I need to beg?” 

 

Before realizing how _inappropriate_ that sounded, her cheeks were flushed red and the hand at her backside wouldn’t let go of her jacket. “As much as I would absolutely cherish those words coming from you, Chloe you just need to ask me.” 

 

“I asked you already.” She says in disbelief and sticks her tongue out between her teeth. “Do you want _me_ to leave?” 

 

Lucifer keeps swallowing the burning in his throat to keep from say words he know he shouldn’t, words that a _former_ angel shouldn’t say, and he manages. 

 

“Ask and you shall receive.” His voice is rough, and his head tilts to meet her eagerness. Her lips are smooth, gliding across with ease. Both of them have kissed multiple — many, in Lucifer’s lifetime — people before they met eachother, and he’s never felt such adrenaline high. 

 

He suspects that it’s something to thank his father for, to apologize for being so stubborn when he has a woman who molds to his body perfectly, who truly loves him for exactly as he presents himself to the world he occupies. 

 

But it’s for another time. 

 

Lucifer decided to stay on Earth, all for one person. She came back to him and it’s all he, the Devil, desired. When speaking to his father earlier, he described how he wanted Chloe to be happy in her life because she deserves everything _good_. If anything, he was the opposite of her in every way possible. 

 

Nothing felt more destined than being in her arms and feeling her pull away from his mouth to regain her composure, only to dive back in for more. If he was meant to be with Chloe, if she was actually made to keep the Devil of Hell under control and understand his emotions, then there was only one thing he let himself acknowledge before he forgets everything when her lips trail along his neck. _He really wants more of that_. 

 

He wasn’t going anywhere, not for a long time. 


End file.
